Confessions of a Cinema Host

I know what everyone thinks when I say I work at a cinema, “wow that’s so cool, I bet that’s so chill do you get free popcorn?!” no, I do not get free popcorn. And most of the time, it’s not actually that cool. Funnily enough, a cinema full of screaming kids and rude guests and endless trails of popcorns that I’ll never enjoy cleaning up is not “super cool”. There’s about a 10% ratio of glamour to the 90% normal, boring part time job just like any other. So without further ado, here’s 10 of the most irritating things about working in a cinema. 1. SO many customer misconceptions, no the popcorn is not made on the day, that would be inefficient and messy. 2. No we do not “get to watch all the films”, funnily enough 80% of my time is spent at work anyway, so I don’t always fancy spending my days off watching movies at work. You’ve probably seen more movies in the last month than I have. 3. Watching a big group of kids walk in is the worst – I know I’m going to be peeling those gummy bears I just sold you off the floor in a few hours. Mess, mess everywhere. 4. SO MANY PEOPLE HOOK UP IN CINEMAS. And the most fun part is arguing over whose turn it is to go and politely flash a torch in their face and tell them stop. 5. A 15 RATED FILM MEANS UNDER 15’S ARE NOT ALLOWED. I don’t care if you are their parent. I don’t care if you are God himself. If the kid is under 15 the kid does not watch the film. Simple. 6. If you are one of the six people who actually attend a super late screening: we all hate you. Every single one of you. 7. I don’t care if you’re 15 tomorrow. You’re not 15 today. No ID, no entry. 8. Oh, and I also don’t care if you’re a student but your five mates aren’t. No student card, no entry. 9. Also, the shirt I’m wearing says Odeon, the hat I’m wearing says Odeon, every part of the building says Odeon. So no, this is not Empire, this is not Cineworld. Use a map. 10. And lastly, I know every single film we’re showing, have shown and will show so if you doubt me for a second when I tell you we are not showing Boss Baby I will politely ask you to get the hell out of my cinema. However, the free movies and discounted snacks is always a plus. Also the flexible hours are pretty great. Oh and the free taxis after midnight are also wonderful. Its not all bad I guess.